Diatribe: When engines were engines and automakers were proud

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I grew up during the beginning of the muscle-car era. It’s really subjective as to when this so-called halcyon time began. Some attribute it to the year that Chevrolet sold its first V-8 model in 1955 that was 265 cubic inches.

Ford already had an overhead-valve V-8 in 1954 that was 239 cubic inches. However, in 1955 it marketed two new Y-block V-8s – 272 cubic inches and an alternative 292 cubic inches. In 1956 Ford added a 312-cubic-inch alternative.

In 1957 Chevy introduced its now-legendary 283-cubic-inch small-block V-8. Ford countered with a supercharged 312 with a pair of four-barrel carburetors. Then 1958 brought forth some monster V-8s: Chevy added a W-head 348-inch engine in a variety of horsepower. Ford offered a 332- and a 352-inch. Both only had three-speed manual transmissions.

In 1959 Chevy offered its first four-speed manual transmission — “four on the floor.” Ford stuck with its “three on the tree.” In 1960 Ford offered a 352-inch 360-horsepower high-performance V-8, but it was still bolted to a three-speed transmission.

In 1961 Ford started eating at the adult’s table. It offered a 390-inch 375-horsepower V-8 with a four-speed (later in the model year). Chevy countered with a 409-inch V-8 – in essence a bigger 348 with performance refinements. The drag strips of the country began seeing record crowds. Besides Ford and Chevy there was increased competition from Chrysler’s Dodge and Plymouth divisions and especially from Pontiac, which had a barnburner of its own via a 389-inch engine with tripower and a four-speed gearbox. They were heavy, but they were swift.

From 1962 until the late ’60s, Ford developed a number of high-performance engines like the 405-horsepower with tripower, a 428-inch engine with several horsepower variants like a 345 version, a 425-horsepower side-oiler and a 427-inch SOHC V-8 that it laughingly rated at 616 horsepower (it was closer to 800 horsepower than 600).

Chevy created a series of big-block V-8s like its 427-inch and 454-inch. Pontiac eventually built a 421-inch 405-horsepower engine with two four-barrel carbs and Chrysler went all out developing its now-famous 426-inch Hemi, which it rated at 425 horsepower with two four-barrel carbs (again, think 600+).

I know what you’re thinking: What’s with this walk down memory lane? Well the joke’s on you. Up until this point all this has been background information. The real gist of this piece is the pride that manufacturers showed by badging their vehicles with a clue as to what was under the hood. Sometimes it was blatant, like a Dodge with a chrome badge that said “426 Hemi.” Another may have been three diagonal chrome strips with a 3-5-2 under each strip. Still another was the stylized Thunderbird with the cubic-inch number of the engine emblazoned on it (like 390, 406 or 427). Even Pontiacs had a cool-looking “421” logo and an even more-menacing tripower logo.

The most subtle braggadocio, however, came from Chevrolet. From 1959-1961 it had three different ways of telling the public what was under the hood. The first was just the Chevrolet badge, which indicated there was a six-cylinder engine. The second was a chrome V bracketing the Chevy badge. This indicated a small-block V-8 (283 inches). But the really slick logos were the cross flags that indicated there was a 348 looming under the bonnet. The ’59 had the engine-indication badge at the front of the hood, the ’60 had an emblem in the center of the grille and the ’61 sported one at the top of the grille. Starting in 1962, the engine identifiers were on the lower front half of the front fenders.

Fast forward to today. Nobody speaks in cubic inches anymore. Today’s nomenclature is in liters and it generally is buried into the class of vehicle. For instance, a Mercedes-Benz S550 has a 5.5-liter engine – just like the ML320 has a 3.2-liter engine. But compare a “5” with a “440” and you might as well be comparing a Bass boat to a guided missile frigate.

If there’s a lesson in any of my blathering it’s this: I have a lot of young readers because they find me amusing. Few view me as a road map for their own careers. But dinosaurs my age have lived through the greatest era(s) that ever existed and for car enthusiasts, the muscle-car era was arguably the apex.

Manufacturers were proud of their offerings; customers were proud of what they bought; and others who could read “logo” were envious. Now, with few exceptions, the biggest engine offered is at best a V-6 and even though the new vehicles are often quicker than the mythical Hemis and side-oilers of the golden era of V-8s, they don’t have the magic – and God knows the all-out brute power sound – of their eight-cylinder behemoth ancestors.

If you want to get some idea of what an “average day” was like in the ’60s and ’70s, pick up a copy of Hemmings Muscle Car magazine or other buff books of that ilk and look at the cars and their high-performance adornments. Those are vehicles that used to be commonplace on driveways and at drive-ins. All the better to eat up the highway with, my dear.

Al Vinikour is a Midwest-based freelance auto writer. Proving a mind is a “terrible thing to use” he sometimes sits in traffic and ponders about things — generally auto-related — that make him mad. Believing the “pen is mightier than the sword” (and generally results in a whole lot less jail time), he vents his anger through a word processor and produces the Driver’s Side Diatribe column. E-mail him at vinikour@comcast.net.